Ed Lines – June 14, 2019

Ed Lines – June 14, 2019

I FOUND myself in rare agreement with a bunch of protesting Muslim parents last week. 

They were not local (Birmingham), although I suspect if Kirklees education chiefs pulled the same stunt, you’d see half of Savile Town and Mount Pleasant on the streets in minutes.

They were protesting at having the LGBT creed shoved down their children’s throats in the classroom. I expect my concerns come from a somewhat different angle, but that’s almost beside the point.

It begs the question – who gets to decide the pecking order of minority rights (in this case LBGT vs Islam) because I’m not happy with it being a judge, either in the UK or Strasbourg, and certainly not some right-on neo-liberal educationalist.

We know for certain who sits plum bottom of the human rights ladder – a white, heterosexual, Christian male. 

He’s long been designated as the lowest form of sentient life, the enduring cause of every ill known to mankind. 

The female of our species is marginally better regarded, before we come upon a mad rush of ‘victimised’ minorities all clamouring for the state’s munificence to be bestowed upon their cause.

From the homeless and the food bank users, to the tree huggers, feminists and every shade of immigrant – they’re all regarded with a kind of socialist sainthood. 

You see, it’s not normal to be normal.

Muslims have been high up that list for a long time, as anyone who’s uttered a critical word and been called an Islamophobic racist will attest. But they have competition, because the nouveau cause du jour is now threatening that superiority – the anything-but-straight brigade.

The confrontation of ideologies in Birmingham was pre-destined. We can’t get our neighbours to re-interpret the Koran in order to prevent terror atrocities and murderous wars, so expecting them to let starry-eyed libertarians brainwash their children into accepting something their holy book says deserves the death penalty, was always going to end in tears.

My kids are well past that birds and bees stage – by the time I told my daughter we needed to talk about sex, she asked “what do you want to know, dad?” (that’s a joke by the way).

Sex education in respect of how male and female bodies differ, how they combine to reproduce, is vastly different – it’s basic biology and I’m happy for someone else to judge when that time’s right. 

We had it in the 1960s as 10/11-year-olds at St Paulinus, a Catholic school of all things (and I suspect it was probably a huge relief for a lot of straight-laced parents).

Equally – and here’s where me and the protesting parents differ slightly – there has to be space, at some stage, to explain the equal rights of Muslim, Christian and atheist; straight, gay and everything in between. Why wouldn’t there be? My problem is feeling (and fearing) that there’s more to this neo-liberal agenda than the simple equality of relationships. 

The crusaders of the LGBT cause that I see, hear and read, can’t help themselves when the opportunity arises to profess and where allowed impose their imagined moral superiority on everyone in the room. Too many aren’t explaining, they’re promoting – alt-sex missionaries with potentially some young, impressionable minds before them. And that agenda hasn’t got a place in a primary school classroom.

I saw two young women walking through Batley last week, holding hands. Good on them, although I suspect two men holding hands might elicit a slightly different response, depending whose watching. Well, Dewsbury and Batley aren’t quite San Francisco or Soho yet, but give it time.

The messages going out to young people from the LGBT lobby seem to suggest that it’s fashionable to be sexually different. They would, but schools should be places for teaching respect and understanding, not campaigning to recruit children, at different stages of physical and psychological development, with the sexiness – pun intended – of their cause. Even saying that will probably earn me a few ‘homophobe’ brickbats because it’s right up there with Islamophobia in the attack-language of the Left. 

But here we are – with a devout religious minority at implacable odds with the trendy stormtroopers of sexual liberation. 

It will be interesting to see who prevails, especially here in Kirklees.

HAVE you ever filed your tax return late? That £100 fine stings, doesn’t it? Do that with your business too many times and expect a long sit-down with several stony-faced accountancy types from HMRC. 

They’re like a bad tempered Doberman when they get their teeth into an already stressed businessman.

Well, sometimes they are. They weren’t with Imran Ahmed, one of the masterminds of an estimated £8billion HMRC/VAT scam. That’s an awful lot of overclaimed miles on your company exes.

I should have said “alleged” because Ahmed has never been jailed – in this country at least – despite HMRC finding he owned shopping malls in the UK and Dubai, £40m of Indian investments, two floors of Dubai’s Burj Khalifa (the world’s tallest building), a Rolls Royce Ghost (£200k there), a Bentley, a Porsche Cayenne – oh, and a load of houses in Dewsbury!

Well, slap my thigh – not bad for a bloke everyone just thought had a laundry in Preston, eh?

The dirty money had links to hate preacher Abu Hamza, Osama bin Laden, the Mohammed Siddique-Khan-led July 7 bombers … but HMRC didn’t hand the info on Ahmed over to MI5 or Special Branch because of concerns over financial privacy.

For the record Ahmed, thought to be in Dubai, denies any fraud. 

I do wonder if he ever bumps into our own Dewsbury property and business magnate Terry Zaman, when Terry’s on one of his Dubai trips. 

After all, Terry has plenty of time for middle east holidays since he was struck off as a director of all his companies – although he looked pretty busy giving a poor bloke orders outside The Courts banqueting centre, last time I saw him.

THE next time I’m pounced on by over-jealous West Yorkshire Police officers and accused of who-knows-what nonsense, I’ll just blithely tell them I’m 15 and have been human trafficked from Vietnam.

Yes, this receding hairline’s a bit of a bugger officer, for a mere teen like wot I am.

It’s a huge racket apparently – I’m looking at photos of drug/prostitute gangsters who all look to have had longer paper rounds than me, who were stopped/arrested, pleaded teen-trafficking, and were put up in children’s homes and foster care, just like that. 

Of course they absconded within hours, were picked up again … and repeat. 

Unbelievable, on all levels – except of course this is Britain.

So no, it isn’t unbelievable at all.

DON’T even get me going on the Westminster Donkey Derby, aka the Conservative leadership race.

Lower taxes on this, double funding for that – I tell you, a couple of the more outlandish promises apart, this could be the Labour or Lib Dem leadership contest.

They all have one thing in common though – none of it will ever transpire, because they are career politicians and they couldn’t lie straight in bed. But neither does it matter who wins, because if they can’t get us out of the EU by the end of October (and the odds are massively against) they might all get another chance in November.

PS: I note that interviewing for Brexit Party candidates starts next week … I hope it’s not before I get back from watching the Toronto Wolfpack playing the Dewsbury Rams.

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